Alaska Airlines from Denver International Airport to Puerto Vallarta

Oh, what joy it brings, contemplating a flight from Denver to Puerto Vallarta on Alaska! My dear wanderlusters, this tale of travel is for you, woven with the threads of sarcasm and poetic expression. If you're ready, let's embark on this tale of turbulent travels under a pallid mid-afternoon sun.

First, praise be to the gods of airfare! Lo and behold, they graced us with the concept of direct flights. It's such a novelty, isn't it? To board an aeroplane in Denver and descend only when the sultry breezes of Puerto Vallarta coax you out? Disregard this wonder if you have an odd fondness for layovers, enduring extended hours marooned in the confines of an unfamiliar airport, perhaps even a non-stop flight is too pedestrian for your intricate tastes.

Does the charm of a round-trip ticket allure you? Quite understandable. The poetry of departure and return – a closed loop of episodic adventure. The mere prospect of one-way travel, however, might send shivers of anxiety down your spine. Come now, it’s not as though you’d drift off the coast, forgotten and forlorn!

If you're contemplating last-minute flights, take a moment to admire your adventurous spirit. The uncertainty, the thrill... It's like a game of Russian roulette, except instead of a bullet, you're playing with the odds of exorbitant ticket prices. But hey, who doesn't love a little risk?

Oh, and dare we forget the intricacies of class – business class, economy class, premium economy, and first-class. Your choice speaks volumes about the indulgence you accord to your travel whims. A small cautionary note though – choose wisely and remember that your in-flight services are directly proportional to your willingness to part with your hard-earned cash.

Then there's the least endeared part of our journey - baggage allowance. Isn't it fascinating how two ounces of extra weight can magically exhaust your credit card limit? It's a carefully crafted dance between the scales and your suitcase, one where the smallest misstep could lead to dire consequences. But worry not, wouldn't it make for a delightful anecdote at your next social gathering?

Pause for a moment and let's talk about Alaska's Mileage Program. It's almost as if they're saying, "Hey, thanks for entrusting your life to us. Here are some points." But oh, the sweetness, when those points transmute into a trip. Gratitude clad in the guise of benevolent travel corporations, truly the stuff of sonnets!

Now, dear seasoned traveller, do bear in mind the flight cancellation policy. Stick your nose in the fine print, why don’t you? It could be the difference between a languid Mexican escapade and a not-so-exciting weekend contemplating the mysteries of your ceiling fan.

A small aside, lest we defy the advice of our high school English teachers demanding a random fact in every essay – did you know Alaska is the only state that can be typed on one row of a traditional English QWERTY keyboard? Quite the buzz at dinner parties, wouldn’t you say?

To conclude, remember that the best time to book your flight is whenever you feel the universe’s cosmic energy shifting in your favor. Or just when you find a good deal online. Whichever comes first. And do check the airline reviews one last time. After all, there's no harm in preparing for the journey, even if the tales of other travelers make your soon-to-be adventure sound as exciting as a spaghetti western without Clint Eastwood.

An adventure awaits, dear traveler. Denver to Puerto Vallarta. May the flights be non-stop, your layovers pleasant, and your spirits as grand as the Alaskan wilderness itself.