Alaska Airlines from Ixtapa / Zihuatanejo to Gerald R. Ford International Airport

Are you pondering the thrilling prospect of swapping the golden beaches of Ixtapa for the alluring, however slightly unrecognized allure of Gerald R. Ford International Airport? Of course, you are! Not many can resist the wild charm of this lesser-known hub of American aviation! Your sure-to-be-epic odyssey will entail navigating the wild blue yonder on the wings of Alaska Airlines, where we've got a great stock of 'flight deals', a.k.a reduced price airfare envoy. Some might even go as far as to call them 'cheap'.

Whether you are opting for a 'round-trip', preferring to dip your toes in both tropical paradise and American suburbia, or choosing a 'one-way' roller coaster journey deep into the heart of America's Midwest, Alaska Airlines is your trusted flying vessel. After all, they are renowned for their high-class standards, which is at a level that only a truly class-conscious individual could understand and appreciate.

Perhaps, you've heard of the dreaded altitude-inducing, bloodshot-eyes-provoking phenomena of the "red-eye flight'. Fear not! In a wicked twist of irony, these flights are actually quite the couture! Imagine One might wonder how an airline named after a state with half of its year in darkness mastered the in-flight services, but quite honestly, the free eye mask and resounding tranquility of passengers sound asleep just don't sound too bad.

Now, don't let the thought of crossing a long stretch of boundary lines deter you from this experience! 'Domestic flights' though they may be called, these are actually 'International flights' in disguise. After all, either starting or ending your journey in 'Ixtapa / Zihuatanejo' may very well feel like heading into another country entirely when you consider the grandeur and oddly unique allure of Gerald R. Ford International Airport.

Speaking of Ford, unlike the US President it is named after, the airport isn't quite famous for pardoning any Nixon deals where 'baggage allowance' is concerned. Fair warning however, if you're a not-so-frequent 'frequent flyer', this might be of help: tightly wrapped sarapes or cheap ceramic skulls you're bringing back for your Aunt Selma count toward that, much like the overpriced bottles of 'authentic' Ixtapa tequila also do. Amazingly, this is true even though 40% of Alaska wilderness area is federally protected!

Should you be considering a 'business class' ticket, one can simply purchase their vainglory for slightly less than a fortune. Wines from the splendid vineyards served by a cordial and fashionable flight attendant, a set of fuzzy socks you've always needed but never really admitted, and a slightly more indulgent lot of legroom awaits the business class flyers! Alaska Airlines truly redefines 'business class', making it a class apart.

Remember, it's best to book when you're feeling fortunate. The 'best time to book' is eternally an enigma, seemingly as elusive as the key to eternal youth (also likely to be found somewhere in Alaska?).

Last but not least, do check the 'flight schedule'. Legend has it that there's a direct flight skipping the layover in Phoenix. Yes! Direct flights to Grand Rapids from Ixtapa. Janice, your high-school Spanish teacher, wouldn't believe it.

With more than a hefty dose of good-natured ridicule and a dash of irony, here's wishing you a delightful journey despite the lack of tropical beaches and frolicking dolphins at your destination. Or as they say in Zihuatanejo, "¡Bon Voyage!", — and remember there couldn’t be a wilder wild than Alaska!