Alaska Airlines from Spokane International Airport to Puerto Vallarta

Oh, the joys of air travel! Embarking on a trip from the shimmering frost of Spokane, colloquially known as "The Lilac City", to the sun-soaked beaches of splendid Puerto Vallarta - a task that, dear traveler, holds an adventurous charm parallel only to the thrill of accidentally choosing "spicy" instead of "mild" salsa at Taco Bell.

I'm here to add a touch of pizzazz to your journey, specifically the intricacies of the ever-enthralling Alaska Airlines. As intriguing as the state itself, Alaska Airlines doesn't disappoint in providing a spectacle. After all, the state of Alaska tends to be quite delightful. Did you know that Alaska has over 100 volcanoes and volcanic fields that have been active within the last two million years? But worry not! When it comes to active volcanoes - they've made sure to leave those out of the passenger cabin.

Let's discuss airfare, shall we? Ever tried deciphering the Da Vinci Code? Cracked the enigma of the Bermuda triangle, perhaps? Well, forget about those amateur tasks, because unpuzzling the cryptic pricing of flight fares has rendered even the most astute minds flabbergasted.

You're given options aplenty when it comes to flights - direct flights, one-way, round-trip, connecting flights, and if you're the daredevil type, the heart-throbbing, adrenaline-inducing red-eye flights—for the nocturnal ones who think, 'Ah! Who needs sleep on a vacation?'.

Dig a bit deeper, and you'll find the economy and business class airfare, lurking in the same lane but worlds apart. My dear friend, dare I say, the difference between economy and business class is akin to the difference between a store-bought sandwich and a gourmet meal prepared by Gordon Ramsay himself. It's a tantalizing game of 'can you afford this comfort, or are you condemned to fold yourself into the space of a shoebox for the duration of your journey?'

However, while booking your tickets, it's crucial to remember, to optimally utilize the baggage allowance given. If it's a round-trip flight you’re taking, it takes at least an abacus, a magic 8 ball, and advanced calculus knowledge to avoid extra charge. After all, why would airlines simply let you enjoy your vacation when they can add extra pressure of luggage weight – absolute party-killers!

When deciding the best time to book, some say it's Tuesdays, or maybe it's two months in advance, or perhaps it's when Mercury is in retrograde and a blue moon rises over the Serengeti. I'm kidding, the best time is always - 'likely too late’. Nothing quite matches the thrill of snagging those elusive cheap flights at the last minute!

Once you've finally decoded the cryptic maze of their airfare, you land knee-deep in the Alaska Airlines mileage program. The more you fly, the more points you accrue. A frequent flyer? You may just have enough points for half a pretzel on your next flight. Such generosity, Alaska Airlines!

Then, finally, when you embark on your well-planned, budget-optimized journey, you can rest easy with Alaska Airlines' state-of-the-art in-flight services. From equally distributed legroom reminiscent of Tokyo apartment space to a mind-boggling variety of drinks, it's an absolute carnival at 30,000 feet. Remember, though, in-flight meals aren't necessarily Michelin Star material unless your standards are more rubber chicken than coq au vin.

So buckle up, brave soul, because one way or another, Alaska Airlines is going to ensure your journey is an unforgettable adventure, just like the state it takes its name from. Have fun and remember — overhead bin space is for imaginary luggage and the occasional small child only!